Why Being Selfish Can Change Your Life For The Better

Why Being Selfish Can Change Your Life For The Better

Remember when you were a child and refused to share your favourite toys with friends and your mum asked you not to be ‘selfish’? That is the first time you learnt how to stop focusing on your needs in order to take care of other people’s needs. As adults, consciously or subconsciously, we still have those words buried deep inside our psyche. Words that make us feel iffy when we try to focus on what we want – things that makes us happy. It’s almost as if we feel guilty if we do something purely for our own joy and growth, whether it’s going off and getting a massage in the afternoon, taking a walk in the park or planning an evening with our girlfriends, the list is endless!

The truth is that if we don’t learn how to be self-ISH, meaning to own our power and to be in our own energy, then we will never develop a strong foundation of self-identity, self-control, and self-awareness. And that’s a real shame. Because then, we will walk around with others having complete control over how we feel, think and find our place in the world. But worry not, there are lots of ways to change that. Nothing is set in stone and together, we can re-wire the way we view selfishness and use it to our advantage.

Understanding Selfishness

Before I give you tools to be selfish, let’s take a moment here to understand what I mean by being self-ISH. Being consciously selfish has nothing to do with being bratty or difficult and causing emotional harm to people along the way.

On the contrary, it’s about acknowledging your needs first and working towards fulfilling them in order to feel more powerful, fulfilled, and whole. Even airlines advice you to put on the oxygen mask first in case of an emergency before helping your child put it on. Then, why not apply that principle in our everyday lives?

When we’re self-aware, we know what we need and channel our energy into creating those outcomes for ourselves. We are in a state of receiving, not taking, and we are consciously creating our reality, systematically, outcome by outcome. In fact, it’s when we aren’t allowed to be self-ISH, or take care of ourselves, that we become selfish, as a response to never having our needs met.

As our needs are always met through our energetic intention, which also allows them to be fulfilled in miraculously creative ways, we connect with others at the point of fulfillment, and not from the point of being needy. So, we are always whole and complete, which creates feelings of confidence and joy in us and that spills into all other areas of our life. Taking care of ourselves, maintaining strong energetic boundaries, being clear about what we do and don’t want in our reality may be something others call selfish, but being truly self-ISH, taking care of ourselves, is the only way to manage our energy and being happy so that we can make others around us happy.

Here Are 5 Ways To Be More Self-ISH In Your Life

1. Be clear about what is important to you and what you want. And ask for exactly what you want, not what you think you can get. Don’t worry about what anyone says or thinks about it. You are responsible for what gets manifested in your life.
2. Know that what others have is available to you when you are aligned with it. There is enough for all and what attracts your attention is an invitation for you to set an intention for it.
3. Set strong energy boundaries! My favourite is ‘Everyone in my life loves, honours, and respects me and everything in my life is a source of love, peace, and joy.’ Use it daily. It helps! Manage your energy boundaries and keep your energy flowing towards your intentions.
4. Release what doesn’t serve you or makes you happy. If it isn’t a source of joy then it isn’t something you’re aligned with. Let it go so something else can take its place.
5. Realise that you aren’t hurting anyone by being self-ISH, or taking care of yourself and fulfilling your needs. Everyone is responsible for their own joy and abundance and when you take care of yourself and show them how confident, happy, and at peace you are, you set an example they can follow.

Learning How To Be Selfish And Generous

As a self-ISH, self-aware person, we use our energy to get our needs fulfilled, which doesn’t mean we’re out in front, grabbing things so no one else gets them first. Self-ISHness lets us see the world from a point of infinite abundance and unlimited possibility and potential. Whatever is right and best for us can be ours, when we intend it as our outcome. Otherwise, we aren’t interested.

We use our energy to set strong boundaries that allows everything we need to connect with us in powerful ways. And from this point of confident power, we know that we will always be fulfilled and in the joy, we allow ourselves to have, we don’t ever feel isolated, abandoned, or unsupported because by being self-ISH, we are always whole and complete, fulfilled and filled full of what our heart desires.

Is it time for you to be self-ISH? We both know the answer to that one!